September 27, 2008

Now What?

I'm still waiting to hear back from school about places I can move to. But in the meantime...

C, the one who is really the cause of all the trouble, and I had a long talk today. 2 and a half hours long. And we talked about everything that had happened, how I feel unwelcome in my own house, how the dirty looks she gives me, the immature games, how all the stuff she does has managed to drive me away.

She took responsibility, apologized, offered to change, to compromise, to try and fix things, then told me she didn't want me to move out because she thought our living together would be a good experience for us both, that she knew it would be a good experience for her.

Problem is... this is not the first time that I've gotten a 'too good to be true' response to talking to her. And last time it turned out to be just that and things got worse. And if I decided to give her another chance, stay and see how things will work themselves out, then I'll miss my chance to leave until next semester, be stuck in hell and be very cranky.

Either way, it sucks. If I leave, I go into an unknown situation, could be good, could be bad. If I stay, I go into an unknown situation, could be good, could be bad.

Maybe I'll just run away to Tanzania.

4 comments:

mrspao said...

I'd probably go if it was me but it is hard to know what to do.

Chris said...

I'd go, too.

AnnotatedLA said...

Tanzania sounds good. Or you could go to Mazatlan... I know a nice lady there who'll give you tequila.

Unknown said...

Get out. She is not going to change (whatever her issues are, they are deep-rooted and need more time than you have to give), and they are not worth the distraction to your studies. A new situation might be bad; but it might also be good, or at least tolerable. At least you have a chance; staying will not improve your situation any. :(